Sexual aftercare is popular in the world of BDSM. After the mix of adrenaline and pleasure, it takes time for couples to calm down and return to their normal selves again. This makes aftercare the best way to end a BDSM sex.
Aftercare is a process of helping an individual compose themselves and process their emotions after an intense experience. The purpose of aftercare is to heal the body after a trauma. A BDSM sex can be traumatic since it involves physical pain from whipping, hair pulling, and others.
On a psychological note, aftercare is essential in making the other person feel cared for. Role-playing can make the submissive partner feel humiliated, crushed, or stressed despite giving consent to the experience. It’s here where aftercare comes in. the cuddling and comforting make your partner feel cared for. The dominant partner may also feel bad due to the pain they inflict on their submissive partner. They, too, need aftercare to return to their best selves and feel good again. Hence, aftercare should be clearly discussed before every BDSM session.
On a side note, aftercare should not be confused with making up or apologizing for abusive behavior. Abusive behaviors are done without the other party’s consent. Making amendments to one’s mistake is important but it’s not some kind of aftercare.
Whether you engage in BDSM or normal sex, aftercare is equally important. Sex is supposed to bring not only pleasure but also good feelings about yourself, mind, body, and the relationship. Aftercare ensures all these are met.
So, what are the proper ways for aftercare? The following tips will help you.
A trip to the bathroom
Peeing after sex is one of the best ways to clear the pipes and remove unwanted substances within. You will also reduce your risk of UTI when you pee after sex, though UTI cases in men are slimmer compared to those in women. Encourage your partner to pee as well to reduce the risks of UTI and pregnancy.
Clean up
Sex is good but it’s also messy. While preparing the room for good sex, put clean towels, tissues or cleansing cloths to clean yourself up after the romp. If you prefer a brief wash with warm water and gentle soap to protect yourself from infection, the better.
Shower together
Showering together after sex is also a good idea to clean up those messy fluids and sweats. It’s also a good way to lengthen intimacy and touch each other’s bodies without sex as your goal. But if it’s coming, then welcome another pleasurable shower sex experience.
Wash your sex toys
Sex toys are a great add-on to pleasurable sex. If you’re using one, clean it up and put it in its proper place right after sex. This way, it’ll come in handy next time you need them. You should also be aware of how sex toys should be washed. Different sex toys require different ways of cleaning up. Make sure to follow the manufacturer’s instructions. Bacteria can grow on the toy’s surfaces if it’s not properly cleaned up.
Pick up used condoms and wrappers
Gather those used up condoms and dispose of them properly. Never expect your partner to pick up those messy condoms. Also, never flush them. Throw them in the proper waste disposal. Your partner will not only appreciate your cleanliness but also your environmental awareness.
Choose cotton underwear
Your genitals will greatly thank you if you use breathable underwear. When it comes to underwear, cotton is the best because of its natural fibers and hypoallergenic properties. Breathable underwear doesn’t retain moisture, which is common after sex.
Pillow talk
Cuddle up and communicate with your partner after making out. Take advantage of the love hormones that have been released after sex. This oxytocin hormone gives you a feeling of closeness and deeper intimacy.
Women love cuddling after sex. It makes them feel comforted and cared for after feeling vulnerable to having sex with you. Cuddling also enhances emotional connection, especially when you look into each other’s eyes while talking.
Since both of you are feeling good after great sex, you’re in the best mood to talk about your dreams and future plans. Honest conversations are key to deeper connection and intimacy. Good communication also allows you to know whether expectations are met or some things need improvement and how both of you can do it.
Give compliments
One reason why you stick to your partner is that there’s something in them that makes you fall for. It would be a shame if they wouldn’t know what makes them tick. Shower your partner the compliments that they deserve. Don’t hold back.
Some women are trapped in the media’s expectations of the perfect body image. Letting your partner know her good points and her body features you love most enhances her self-esteem and body image perception.
Also, giving each other compliments strengthens your bond and relationship. Besides, having a clear perspective on why your partner matters in your life keeps your relationship intact should you meet challenges along the way.
Drink a glass of water
Drink a glass of waterSex can be energy depleting. To keep those nerves running smoothly again, hydrate yourself with a glass of water. Water also helps clean the urinary tracts by flushing out bacteria and toxins.
Fill your stomach
Your body burns calories during sex. That’s why feeling hungry after each session is inevitable. If possible, prepare some healthy food before hitting the sack. Put it on your bedside table to munch on while cuddling with each other. But if you want to prolong your bonding in the kitchen, cooking or preparing your favorite snacks will do it.
A good laugh relaxes the mind and eases off a tired body. Share corny jokes, silly stories, and anything that will crack you both into a good laugh. A bit of humor spices up your connection. The good feeling you get after great sex and enjoyable moments together will last even after 48 hours according to experts. And this will extend into your other relationships.
